Knit hat + socks + gloves = ready for bed

Poor Rich. Just when he thought my wearing flannel jammies was bad enough, now he has to contend with my additional attire! The hat and socks don't make it through the night, as my head and feet warm up eventually. But the gloves are kept on to keep the Bag Balm on my hands, not the bedding. This morning Rich told me he had nightmares all night. When I asked him what he dreamed about, he said "cows". When I asked him why he dreamed about cows, he said it was because of the udder cream (Bag Balm) he smelled all night. Oh, he thinks he's so funny!

We spent this past weekend with five other couples we've know since our college days, and stayed at one of the couple's cottage just north of Grand Rapids. There's nothing like being with old friends who know you well. Lots of love and warm fuzzies among us, and tons of laughs. We took long walks along the lake, and made up our own version of Curling, enjoying eachother's company and the warm, sunny weather outside. One of the gals brought along her new power point projector and we were able to see pictures we had brought of our families and vacations, and some of the pictures went back to when our group first started getting together in the 80's. Oh, the hairstyles and clothes we wore. And how cute our kids were. Where has all the time gone?

I was the first to slip upstairs to bed for the night, and was surprised to realize that in the midst of all this love and happiness, I felt sad. It was like I suddenly remembered that I had cancer, and I didn't like that at all. No one had treated me differently; we talked freely about my chemo and my journey. But I think that being in the midst of all the normalcy of the weekend I realized that things really weren't normal, not for me at least. I didn't cry, I just reflected on why I was feeling this way. For the first time, I was very conscious of having to wear a hat or wig all the time, and it made me feel that big "C" on my forehead again. Sure, my wigs and hats are fun for short periods of time, but wearing them all the time as I did this weekend just reminded me of WHY I'm wearing them.

I guess I was due for a "pitty party" sooner or later, and mine didn't last long. It was just more of a reality check for me, and I've moved on from it. Tomorrow is my third "bad chemo" infusion which means that I'm half way through, and that's cause for celebration!